15 Days

 Tonight I'm sitting here in my half-empty apartment and wondering how much different my life will be fifteen days from now...

I'm reviewing the last couple years and what I have witnessed, how I have felt, and also how I have changed.

The world still turns but yet I am reminded to be grateful for the small moments, the little gestures of kindness, and the laughter from those who I love.

I feel fortunate to be able to do what I am about to do, and I've been inspired by others who have also sought out this journey to try and better their lives by moving or changing the scenery. 

After going through physical life changes and medical scenarios one must think that bravery is heightened and fear perhaps a driving force to propel one's self into situations they know they can't live without.

The above statement is very true for me in many facets, some I know people will never understand.

To know yourself and push away distractions is hard, especially when we are hurt or angry. But you have to remember that you are living in your mind and in order to enjoy the present we have to almost re-program it with new thoughts and new ideas. :)

So, my empty apartment - while it's a little strange. It's giving me and my mind a new perspective on life, that we can morph and change in any way we see fit once we add action.

I have been sad, I have sat at my parent's dinner table and realized that I won't be an hour away much longer. 

I have sold things that I have carried with me for over 20 years. I watched couples come to my apartment and collect a dresser I had in my bedroom when I was 13 years old - just like that it was gone. The kitchen table that I hosted date nights and friends, is now sold to a young 20-year-old who was simply looking for a small table for her studio. But I smiled knowing these people would appreciate them and use them for years to come. :)

The bay area has been my home for so long, I know it like the back of my hand and I have lived all over.

But it feels right to distance me from this place for a while, to pause, to get quiet, or simply collect my heart again.

I hope that my journey inspires you.

I hope that by reading my little blog you will find some peace or energy to look deeper into yourself.

As we age and the wrinkles come and our bodies shift, one thing we can be grateful for is our mind, that it's such a beautiful thing to have, and to nurture it with kindness and words that feel good. 

We can do so much with our words and our hearts.

Sweet dreams my friends, you are loved. ❤️